Are you ready to have the talk of a lifetime?
Is there something you’ve always wanted to know? But never felt quite brave enough to ask…
Have you ever wondered how your parents met? What your Dad’s favourite meal was as a child? What your Mum dreamed of being when she was a young girl?
Or do you sometimes catch yourself thinking, “I have no idea what my brother’s religious views are these days”; “I wonder what memories Mum cherishes from her past…”; “Does Dad have an ambition he still wishes to achieve?”.
We’ve all had moments when it dawns on us that one day we should find out a little more about those we are closest to. We spend the formative parts of our relationships actively getting to know each other, or grow up side by side with our family, often leading us into the trap of thinking that we know it all; that we know our partner inside-out, or that if Dad had something of interest to share from his past he would have revealed it by now.
But what happens when time starts running out? Or does in fact run out, leaving us with all these unanswered questions.
“Describe the most adventurous thing you’ve done.”
None of us want to be in the position where a loved one has passed away and we are left feeling that things were left unsaid. And vice versa; when our own time is running out, surely we don’t want to miss out on the opportunity to share our treasured memories with loved ones, or to express words that may have felt too hard to say.
Which is where NFDA’s Have the Talk of a Lifetime cards come in. These recently popped up on our radar and have now just arrived on Grand & Grave’s desk. This pocket-sized deck of cards contains 50 questions designed to help you learn more about those that you care about, your family and friends.
We absolutely love this concept as the first step towards opening up conversations around final wishes and death literacy. It works beautifully as a tool to guide the kind of special conversations that enlighten our understanding of those closest to us, building upon what bond there already is and enabling there to be a safe space within which the conversation can grow towards other subjects such as how we would like to be remembered.
Talking about life and experiences, rather than sickness, age or practicalities, can be an empowering process. Instead of focusing on the heartache and pain which may lie ahead it creates joy and celebration for a life lived. And it is exactly for this reason why building upon one’s own death literacy is so important. Not only does it give you strength and support in feeling confident that you are aware of the options available to you, but it also gives you the time and head space to dedicate to meaningful conversations that enrich the time you have with loved ones when an end of life is on the horizon.
And so, whether you want to get yourself a pack of these cards today, or simply wish to be brave and ask a question never asked before, overcome that inner voice which may make you feel silly for asking and start up a conversation of a lifetime today!
Ps. We’d love to hear how you get on, or if you’ve already had a conversation of lifetime with family or friends. Connect with us on Twitter to share your stories.